song recommendation

FT ISLAND - WIND

why do i have this blog again? huh

i kinda wanna share my thought at first but i guess i am either too introvert without me knowing that or it's just a hassle to write here. guess writing aint really my forte.

anyway, i'd like to share the song above Wind by FT ISLAND. yes, a korean song. they are a band. a nice song. great one actually. turn on cc for english sub. that band never disappoint me. their lyrics and vocals and instruments are just ... damn harmonious. thats the least i cld say. aint a music person. just enjoy it. anyway, go check that out

off my chest

being away from home really makes me feel the void. i am not even that close with my fam.. we are getting better though. i have this huge age gap with my sisters and brother and all of us were sent to boarding school; less time spent with one another. we are getting older and mature now tho so could actually understand one another better. well, more like me to them and vice versa. i used to think that i am pressured to fulfill all the expectations my fam or at least my parents have for me. it was a burden actually, all those expectation but i grew accustomed to them. i mean that's what a child should do right? please they parents? of course i want to live my own life, doing things on my own accord but the problem is, i dont even know what i am good at or what i should be doing in life. i truly am lost. which is why i just decide to follow whatever they planned for me and try my best to make it work so i could be contented by them. these thoughts i am having maybe because i am missing home. it's currently holiday and i would like to be home but my mom didnt really agree with me. she said it was too short of a break and that  should just focus on my thesis. god really.. i just miss her, and dad. everyone.

i am currently doing my practicum as a trainee ESL teacher. i posted my picture at school on fb just to give a lil update to my fam, friends, teachers... never ever it crossed my mind that my sisters would be soooo supportive . i mean they gave words of encouragement, advice and even joked around. yeah maybe our relationship is getting better it is just i am still awkward around them. maybe i should be more accepting and break my wall, let em in.. but it is just difficult. i love them, i know i do.. they are my flesh and blood . it is just we have a little to no interaction so i ended up secluding myself. 

i dont know. i was just ranting here and about.. tryna get this off my chest. i wont say it feels light now, but it's good to write these complicated unknown emotion out. just that.

till then